Then Jesus said to His disciples,
"If anyone desires to come after Me,
let him deny himself,
and take up his cross,
and follow Me.
For whoever desires to save his life will lose it,
but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.
Matthew 16:24-25
The fall of man has twisted godly attitudes to become self centered and carnal, which turn us away from GOD. Loving yourself is such an attitude. We need to understand that if we love and cherish our carnal self, we will not please GOD. We must decide to deny that part of our self, but feed and nourish the spiritual part.
Then one of them, a lawyer, asked Him a question, testing Him, and saying,
"Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?"
Jesus said to him,
"'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.'
This is the first and great commandment.
And the second is like it: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'
On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets."
Matthew 22:35-40
GOD exhorts and commands us to work on loving Him, Who is the source of pure love.
Such direction and focus would cause us to receive His love into our hearts.
His Spirit of love will cause increase in the spiritual part of us which is GOD desiring,
GOD honouring and GOD resembling.
GOD commands us next, to love our neighbour as ourselves. Your closest neighbour is your spouse! Work on loving your spouse and you will be doing good to yourself!
So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies;
he who loves his wife loves himself.
For no one ever hated his own flesh,
but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.
Ephesians 5:28-29
The Bible speaks about certain attitudes, affections and leanings in us that are natural. We must understand that those are not commandments, but statements of the state of mankind.
It is natural for each one of us to desire the best for our own flesh. Those who have mental disorders such as anxiety and depression would say "I hate myself. I don't like my appearance. I wish I were dead!" These statements are not the truth because they are under the oppression and lies of the devil, the enemy of their soul! The Bible, which is the truth, states that no one ever hated his own flesh! The negative reactions of these individuals towards unfavourable situations or physical appearance, is very proof that they love themselves.
Therefore the scale is: Love GOD more than you love yourself.
Love others as much as you love yourself.
Now great multitudes went with Him. And He turned and said to them,
"If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother,
wife and children, brothers and sisters,
yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple.
And whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple.
Luke 14:25-27
The LORD expects us to deny our natural affections and bondings to love Him and follow Him.
In doing this, our imperfect, corrupted love is purified.
Thus our love for others becomes pure as GOD'S love for us.
He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me.
Matthew 10:37
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
"Honor your father and mother," which is the first commandment with promise:
"that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth."
And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath,
but
bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
Ephesians 6:1-4
But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come:
For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money,
boasters, proud, blasphemers,
disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
unloving, unforgiving, slanderers,
without self-control, brutal, despisers of good,
traitors, headstrong, haughty,
lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
having a form of godliness but denying its power.
And from such people turn away!
For of this sort are those who creep into households
and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins,
led away by various lusts,
always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
Now as Jannes and Jambres resisted Moses,
so do these also resist the truth:
men of corrupt minds, disapproved concerning the faith;
but they will progress no further, for their folly will be manifest to all, as theirs also was.
2 Timothy 3:1-9
The corrupted, selfish love in fallen mankind brings forth the love of money,
which is a root of all kinds of evil.
It also replaces the love of GOD by the the love of pleasure.
The love of money results in various kinds of wrong attitudes,
words and actions of an ungodly life, as listed in the above portion of Scripture.
These spoil relationships and hinder the flow of GOD'S love.
It is natural for all of us to love ourselves.
JESUS asked us to deny self and follow Him.
We are enabled to do this by receiving GOD'S love
and loving GOD with all of our heart.
The love of GOD flows through us to others,
enabling them to taste the purity and beauty
of that divine agape love!